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Next Life, NO Kids: Friendship is Wicked Awesome

July 27, 2017

Friendship is Wicked Awesome

I had lunch with a good friend from high school on Saturday. We weren't close friends then, because we were both too busy worrying about what everyone was thinking about us, but we've reconnected in that same vein.

We challenge and encourage each other to do things we don't want to in order to grow as humans, because that's what friendship does. Like when our 20 year reunion rolled around (because we are old AF), and neither of us wanted to go (because high school is torture), we basically held each other accountable to go. We met early, hung with the few people we actually enjoyed during those horrible years, and didn't much leave each other's side. It turned out to be kind of a blast, but not because it was a terribly good time, but rather because we were being adventurous... and surviving.
I've spent A LOT of my life hiding from real relationships with women, because they're scary AF.
It has been my experience that friendship makes you a better person. It doesn't point out your flaws just for funsies, and it's somewhere you can feel safe to be exactly who you are. Good friendship guides your heart to the truth, and then sits with you there if you're not entirely ready to look at it yet. Friendship is fun and allows for ridiculousness. It's a place I don't have to be "ON" all the time, and can just be myself.

I'm so grateful for good friendship in my life today. To accept it, and know what it means to be a good friend. To understand that in order for it to flourish, I have to do my part and the fact that my part isn't always giving. Sometimes being a good friend means taking from another person, and allowing them the opportunity to give.

That's the key -- the golden ticket.

My friend and I, both admittedly awful at the give and take aspects of friendship, are learning how to lean on each other for support and perfect the sway. We're helping each other see that there actually is no perfect formula for balance in support, as long as it keeps moving from one to the other.

I haven't always been comfortable with receiving, because it has often come along with strings and debts I didn't want to pay. It has been difficult to trust another person - especially other women - because of how wretched I know we can be to one another when shit hits the fan.

It has taken me 39 years to be even remotely comfortable in my skin - with my genuine self - and allow someone else the opportunity to see all of me; good, bad, and ugly. I don't suppose that matters much in the grand scheme of things.

What matters is, that Friendship -- TRUE FRIENDSHIP -- has helped me find her.

 Friendship is wicked awesome.

To experience the full force of my time with my dear friend, watch this:

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