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Next Life, NO Kids: November 2015

November 26, 2015

Look Who Came To Dinner

It's Thanksgiving, and I'm cranky.
  
Someone joined us today that I don’t like very much, and I really struggled with having to spend the whole day with her. She's never really been much fun, and happiest when she can just lay around in sweatpants feeling sorry for herself. Obviously, having to get dolled up and commute and hour and a half for Thanksgiving dinner today was an issue. I tried to lighten the mood in hopes of brightening her spirit so she might stop being such a total downer, but she just ignored me every time I attempted to speak to her.

Half way through, I gave up on any possibility of just enjoying the day; with family members we hardly get the chance to see, because she was so wretched.

Sure, she made small talk and laughed it up with everyone, but she didn’t fool me for a second. I saw right through her sarcastic remarks and class clown act. I wondered if anyone else could see it; how clearly out of place she felt. Maybe they wondered why I thought it a good idea to bring her along and were, like me, wishing she would just shut up already.

 
I really hate her. She ruins most everything. Every time someone asked me how I was doing or what I was up to, she downplayed the details of my life in a way that made me feel insignificant and small. She said things like, “You’re embarrassing yourself. No one really cares how you’re doing. They’re just asking to be polite.”
 
She made it impossible for me to enjoy any part of the day. Almost everything she said was laced with snark, and she kept treating my children like an annoyance or some sort of inconvenience. 

Can you imagine?
 
Clearly she needed attention, so before we left she shared some really sensitive information about me like it was a joke, and then laughed along with everyone else in the room. It was awful, and I couldn’t even speak up because she just kept talking over me and continuing the horrible conversation.

 
I wanted so badly just to leave her there, but unfortunately she made her way into our car and joined us for the trip back home. She walked right into my house, and made herself comfortable. At some point, she will follow me to bed; where she will relentlessly ask me to recall every time I said and/or did the wrong thing today. She will confirm my fear that we should have just stayed home, and that we should probably never leave the house again.

 
It's Thanksgiving, and I'm cranky. 

I'm tired of having to open my whole life up to Depression, I'm annoyed by the awareness that she has no plans to leave me anytime soon, and I’m already sick to death and exhausted by the powerlessness of her grip.





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November 23, 2015

Big Girl Pants and Shiny Things

If you follow me, you know I've been a terrible blogger this year. I launched too many things and forgot that I'm a horrible juggler. It's been difficult to balance all the things, and chaos is a huge trigger for me; which is funny, considering how often I seem to throw myself directly into it.  I can do it. I can do it all.

I have been a mess since I started The Mom Movement in February. Funny thing is, in January I decided this was definitely going to be the year of "less." 

Hilarious.

This year has been about finding acceptance. There are apparently certain things about me that are just part of my genetic make-up. 
  • When I am passionate about something, I will always take on too much and drive myself into the ground. 
  • I am passionate about many things.
  • I will always be tired.
  • I am too trusting, and believe integrity is something everyone appreciates and strives for. 
  • I put too much pressure on myself because my ego often tells me I'm the only one who can properly fix stuff when it breaks.
  • When I get overwhelmed I shut down and that sometimes leads to depression.
  • I will always be overwhelmed. 
  • I suck at taking care of me because I forget that taking care of you is not the same thing. It makes me feel wonderful to help people, but I have limits.
  • I think limits are gross.
I have spent a lot of time and energy fighting, avoiding, or trying to cure myself of these things. This year has been less about psychoanalysis and the WHY, and more about embracing the HOW. I have been focusing on how I can maneuver around these sometimes treacherous, but also wonderful things about me - how to work around them and push through. It has been a year of moving forward; about asking for and accepting help while (not always secretly) kicking and screaming. It has meant allowing others to pry stuff from of my KungFu grips - to help me.

This all might sound terrible to you, but this year has been one of my best. This year has been about Big Girl Pants. 

Next Life, NO Kids started out as a humor blog. It saved me during a really difficult and messy point in my life. I needed the release that mocking everything allowed. Since then, I have processed a ton, and gotten way more comfortable with the facts about me that I was sure left me fatally flawed. Writing about those things here, and connecting with others who "get" me, has healed me in ways words will not explain.

I have really struggled with writing lately, out of some sick loyalty to humor - not wanting to disappoint anyone who came to the yard expecting hilarious milkshakes. I'm over it. I write about life, and life is not always funny.

Over the last two years, this blog has evolved into something so much more than I could have ever imagined.  It has led me to and opened doors I never would have considered walking through.

And so, with my big girl pants pulled up to my armpits, it's time to walk through another.

I am officially letting go of the old Next Life, NO Kids humor blog. I will no longer be stressing myself out hoping you don't leave me because I'm not hilarious today.

Welcome to the new Next Life, NO Kids blog. My life blog.

In honor of these changes and also big girl pants, I'm giving away some comfort jewelry.


This summer I had the incredible pleasure of meeting AnneMarie. She owns and operates an adorable boutique in Cape Cod, MA called Bumbalina - "It's All About Me."  I was immediately attracted to the name, because DUH.

As soon as I walked in, AnneMarie starting talking to me, and I fell in love with her. She and her teenage daughter Annabelle run the small business together. Wait. What?? Yes, you read that correctly - a mother and her teenage daughter are successfully running stuff! I am so impressed with how well they interact and support each other. They clearly appreciate one another, and the opportunity to support them and their family business is such an incredible gift. 

Oh, and SHINY THINGS!!! They also have shiny things. Enter below to win this GORGEOUS Cape Cod bracelet with Swarovski crystals!!

Cape Cod Bracelet with sterling silver and Swarovski crystal bead.
Cuff is sterling silver over brass.

a Rafflecopter giveaway  

Don't forget to leave a comment below about why you should win! 

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